Andrew's
Legacy
On an icy February afternoon, in front of a group of witnesses, Andrew was attacked on his way home from the school bus. He was jumped from behind and beaten while another child (an upstander boy) ran to our front door, pounding, and alerting us to the trouble that Andrew was in. As I ran barefoot through the icy snow to rescue him, I was shocked to see that his attacker was a girl! She left my broken boy on the sidewalk with bloody scrapes on his forehead, both hands, and both knees, as well as bruises on his arms and torso. The bully girl cackled as she ran down the middle of the street to escape. The upstander boy helped me lift Andrew to his feet and half carry him home since he was unable to walk on his own.
I immediately reached out to the school, the bus garage, and eventually the police. No one wanted to help us. I was aware of some bullying issues at the bus stop and on bus rides. I thought that the bullying had been previously addressed. Andrew said he had hidden the bully girl’s identity from me because of embarrassment. She beat up and bullied many children. He wasn’t sure how I would react. He had been taught from a young age to never resort to physical violence. Especially towards females. He didn’t want to look like a coward by refusing to hit her back. He just knew that it was the right thing to do. He would rather turn the other cheek than break his own moral code about violence against females.
Andrew confided in me that he chose to forgive her before his wounds had even healed. That made me proud of him. He said it saddened him to think about the brokenness in her heart and life that would lead her to do such terrible things to others.
Months passed by… then on July 13, 2009, kind and loving 11-year-old Andrew went outside to play with neighbors and never returned home. He was last seen alive in the undeveloped neighborhood park with the same abusive and mean 9 1/2-year-old neighborhood bully girl.
We were never given clear answers about what happened to Andrew by the Toledo Police Detective assigned to the case. We do know that the bully girl first claimed to watch him take his own life. The next day, she admitted to neighborhood children that she took his life using a rope. The third day, she told the detective two other stories, again blaming Andrew and painting herself as a victim.
The justice system failed my son and the bully girl. She got away with her crime by telling stories that did not add up to match the physical evidence left behind.
Shortly after Andrew went to Heaven, I learned about ‘The Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket’ by Dr. Donald O. Clifton. I chose to replace some of the broken pieces of my heart with “Bucket Filling” in memory of my beloved Andrew.
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